challenge: top ten

for this top ten (it can count as your monday post if you want) chose the top ten most memorable or influential songs of your life and put them in a play list (go to playlist.com to create one). then write a little bit about a few of the songs. here's mine in chronological order:

1. a better son/daughter by rilo kiley: i listened to this song a lot after my brother died. it is sort of an anthem for me: things are going to get better. the drum really drives that feeling.

8. amazing grace on the bagpipes: my mom absolutely loves this song and bagpipes. to me, it represents her.

9. what a wonderful world by louis armstrong: my dad loves "sachmo" and would always sing this song when i was growing up.

10. el shaddai by amy grant: when my family went on road trips we would always bring along the collection of amy grant tapes. this is one that i remember sing along to a lot.

the other songs all held meaning at different times in my life. no children by the mountain goats was the song that got me hooked on them :]

i can't wait to hear yours!

10 things to get for someone going to paris

1. an umbrella - (preferably black with white polka - dots) because it's classy
2. sleeping pills - they'll need 'em after all the café
3. a money belt - rick steves swears by them
4. a french-english dictionary - self-explanatory
5. a neck scarf - because it's classy
6. big black sunglasses - see numbers 1 & 5
7. a t-shirt that says i'm sorry - if they are american
8. a sleeping mask - see numbers 1, 5 & 6
9. a big canvas tote - to carry all of the souvenirs they are buying for you
10. a book - it's a long plane ride

11. a wine guide - lots of drinking!

so cool!

top ten reasons to love halloween

1. pumpkins!!! pumpkins everywhere! lit up on stoops, in giant bins outside of grocery stores, in your cheesecake, lattes, bread, muffins... pumpkins all around.

2. candy corn. also, candy pumpkins (see above). especially when your future mother-in-law, who is always laughing at your boyfriend for being weird, tells about how just last week she was hanging out with her friends and put candy corn "fangs" in.

3. leaves. in many colors. blowing around like multi-color confetti in the wind. speaking of wind, it turns out it's something the tri-cities specializes in.

4. candy everywhere. all the time, all over the place. chocolate, nerds, caramels, suckers. everything. everywhere.

5. costumes. of course. the best part is being able to wear jeans to work. :) and, of course, it's the one day a year that i don fake eyelashes.

6. corn maizes!!! !!! !!!!! ah, the flashlight fun. the costumed weirdos stalking you in the middle of nowhere with toy chainsaws. the corn cobs flying through the air. the way, when you're done, you can no longer feel your ass because your choice to wear the costume with the mini skirt was a very very poor one. i love love love corn maizes.

7. parties. including and especially drinking. alcohol. especially since the calories gained by the candy aren't nearly plentiful enough.

8. trick-or-treating. i hear it's so much fun. getting candy for free from strangers. the one time i've gone, my favorite part was being able to see into people's houses and see how they live and decorate. yes, i know i'm twisted.

9. cute kids in costumes. because there's not excuse enough to dress a baby up as a bumble bee.

10. BEING ABLE TO CELEBRATE IT!!!!! kicks ass.

i love autumn!

i had to stop a minute and take this picture on sunday before heading out to my mom's. it was just so quintessentially fall.

signs you are sick

1) sneezing - i mean repeated sneezes, like five in a row, every hour

2) hot flashes - normally you tend to run cold, but when everyone else in the office is freezing, you're comfortable

3) suddenly cold - just after a hot flash, you're all of a sudden freezing. not just cold, but shaking

4) you're cranky - yeah, the person on the other end of that phone call may have terminal cancer, but damnit! they need to pay their bills just like everyone else!

5) loss of appetite - normally you could eat all day, but not when everything tastes like cardboard

6) tiredness - at 8:30pm on a saturday, you - 25 and single - are already in bed

7) cough - the kind that makes your head feel like it will implode and keeps you and your neighbors up at night

8) apathy - you don't care what the hell is going on in the world - you just want some f-ing peace and quiet!

9) red nose - after countless hours spent blowing your nose with cheap office tissue, you are mistaken for a drunk

10) addiction - every four hours to the second you reach for that bottle of thick sweet syrup

mario andretti: concluded

he found a new home with a little girl who loved him from the start. :)

story-starter

as more and more banks go bankrupt, the government starts buying more and more of them until they control the country's finances. in a seemingly-utopian move, they outlaw paper money and issue every social security card-holding american a debit card. now able to monitor incomes and expenditures for all people, the crime rate goes down, as does poverty, since the government can accurately monitor and supplement below-living-standard incomes. the national debt vanishes.

the tricky part is trying to figure out what direction to take the problem of the story. i mean, we would start having a hand in controlling other world markets. either other countries would have to accept our non-currency or they would have to stop doing business with us. not really a huge problem, as we already have non-currency with credit and debit cards.

the other problem would be the people in the country who don't have social security cards. whole immigrant families relying on their native-born children to work and buy for them. but not buy too much, because the government has discovered many an illegal immigrant that way. or maybe they'd develop these little sects of people who create communes in the country, growing and trading and such.

it has potential, i just don't know what to do with it.

mario andretti

i'm trying to find a new home for my little hamster. we don't play with him enough. problem is, i don't want to *give* him away because i don't want him to become snake food. so i'm selling him for $10 and have gotten no hits. :(

halloween costumes

here are some ideas for that last minute halloween party. (not all of them are in good taste.)

1) smarty pants: tape smarties all over the front of your pants. if you wear glasses, wrap tape between the lenses. caution: only apply candy to front of pants. you wouldn't look too smart sitting on the candy.

2) undercover C.I.A. agent: all you need are jeans, a t-shirt and those cool aviator sunglasses. do the johnny depp - once upon a time in mexico - thing and wear a t-shirt that reads "C.I.A." for extra points.

3) growth spurt: rummage through your closet, or shop your local thrift store to find clothes at least two sizes too small. practice a goofy walk or uneven voice for that extra awkwardness.

4) bookworm: wear glasses, dress in all green and carry around a book. show extra effort and memorize a monologue or poem.

5) conspiracy theorist: put a colander on your head, wear a garlic necklace and carry around a flask, refusing to drink or eat any food besides your own.

6) vigilante: simply wear your under garments on top of your clothes and fashion a cape out of a large towel or bed sheet. use only your cleanest underwear to avoid embarrassment.

7) an onion: starting with your lightest weight and most tight-fighting, layer on as many articles of clothing as possible. this costume works best for outdoor activities.

8) depression: skip your shower for a couple of days and wear sweat pants and shirt and carry around a half-eaten carton of ice cream. answer all questions with a non-committal noise.

9) the economy: wear a white t-shirt with a large red downward arrow. act the part by displaying manic depressive behavior.

10) yourself, as a Jehovah's Witness: just say you don't observe holidays. no costume required.

top ten favorite fake meats

10. tofurky dogs - good texture, and just enough phallic resemblance to make dinner enjoyable
9. morning star chicken starters - just don't let them send you to the hospital. $4500 later you might be regretting it
8. quorn chicken - small portions, but very edible and good for seasoning
7. morning star chicken nuggets - a tasty lunch or snack!
6. yves pepperoni - just get a cheese pizza and slap these on. i've been seriously considering taking a package to papa murphys and seeing if they'll put them on my pizza, too.
5. morning star hamburger patties - i'm just having a recent craving for hamburger. probably after i cooked one up, topped it with cheese, avocado, and lettuce, and put it on a warmed onion roll bun.
4. morning star buffalo wings - just the right kind of spicy, no bones or gristle.
3. field roast - makes a wonderful valentine's day dinner, too!
2. field roast apple sausages - i need to get me some more of these, just the right amount of sweetness
1. tofurky hickory smoked sandwich meat - i could live off this stuff.

new challenge

all right, we're gonna get this blog off the ground, with weekly challenges. or rather bi-weekly, since we'll trade off. starting with me on monday, each monday, we need to come up with a top-ten list. it can be on anything we want whatsoever, just make a top-ten list and talk a little about it. then next monday, you'll come up with one, etc.

capisce?